SYMPTOMS OF OLD AGE – LAUGH AT YOURSELF:)), IT IS THERAPEUTIC

This topic contains 18 replies, has 7 voices, and was last updated by  Anonymous 14 years, 2 months ago.

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  • #62572


    Anonymous

    FIFTY PLUS
    Q: Where can women over the age of 50 find young, sexy men, who are interested in them?
    A: Try a bookstore under fiction.
    Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?
    A: Keep busy. If you’re handy with tools, you can finish the basement. When you are done you will have a place to live.

    Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your 50+ year old husband?
    A: Tell him you’re pregnant.

    Q: How can you avoid spotting a wrinkle every time you walk by a mirror?
    A: The next time you’re in front of a mirror, take off your glasses.

    Q: Why should 50+ year old people use valet parking?
    A: Valets don’t forget where they park your car.

    Q: Is it common for 50+ year olds to have problems with short term memory storage?
    A: Storing memory is not a problem, retrieving it is a problem.

    Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly?
    A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon.

    Q: Where do 50+ year olds look for fashionable glasses?
    A: Their foreheads.

    Q: What is the most common remark made by 50+ year olds when they enter antique stores?
    A: “I remember these.”

    thanks again my dear friend from Montreal:)

  • #61559


    Anonymous

    :)) :)) when I received this from a friend I really had a good laugh!, knowing that someone knows what is happening to me, [well, i realized I am not alone in this situation!:)] marami tayo!! getting old is fun when you are comfortable with it and is wholeheartedly accepted!:) herak ki Diyos I am!:))

  • #61501


    Rod
    Participant

    OMG! I thought you were talking about me Manay Rose. LOL! This is me on a typical week-end….too many things to do, nothing gets accomplished. Yikes! Growing old sucks.

  • #61460


    Anonymous

    A.A.A.D.D. – Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder. This is how it manifests:I decide to water my garden. As I turn on the hose in the driveway, Ilook over at my car and decide my car needs washing.As I start toward the garage, I notice that there is mail on the porchtable that I brought up from the mailbox earlier. I decide to gothrough the mail before I wash the car. I lay my car keys down on thetable, put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table and notice that the can is full.
    So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbagefirst. But then I think, since I’m going to be near the mailbox, when I take
    out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first.
    I take my checkbook off the table and see that there is only 1 check left.
    My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house tomy desk where I find the can of Coke that I had been drinking.
    I’m going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the Coke asideso that I don’t accidentally knock it over. I see that the Coke isgetting warm and I decide I should put it in the refrigerator to keep itcold. As I head toward the kitchen with the Coke, a vase of flowers onthe counter catches my eye– they need to be watered. I set the Cokedown on the counter and I discover my reading glasses that I’ve beensearching for all morning.
    I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I’m going to water
    the flowers. I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a
    container with water and suddenly I spot the TV remote. Someone left it
    on the kitchen table. I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I
    will be looking for the remote, but I won’t remember that it’s on the
    kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs,
    but first I’ll water the flowers. I pour some water in the flowers, but
    quite a bit of it spills on the floor.So, I set the remote back down on the table, get some towels and wipe up
    the spill. Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.At the end of the day:—-the car isn’t washed,—-the bills aren’t paid,—-there is a warm can of Coke sitting on the counter,—-the flowers don’t have enough water,—-there is still only 1 check in my check book,—-I can’t find the remote,—-I can’t find my glasses,—-and I don’t remember what I did with the car keys.
    Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I’m reallybaffled because I know I was busy all day long and I’m really tired. Irealize this is a serious problem and I’ll try toget some help for it but first I’ll check my email.Do me a favor, will you? Forward this message to everyone you know,because I don’t remember to whom it has been sent.Don’t laugh — if this isn’t you yet, your day is coming!GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY.GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL.LAUGHING AT YOURSELF IS THERAPEUTIC.

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